Chapter 21
Daisy’s POV
The birth of Ellah came unexpectedly… she was born prematurely. And it came as an eye-opener to me that the reality of motherhood was now at my doorstep.
It was something I couldn’t escape, something I couldn’t let go of and the experience of labor was unforgettable.
During labor, I remembered the pleasure her father and I both derived from producing her.
And I was on the verge of cursing him when Nina burst into the labor room despite the protest from the nurses. She bluntly told them she was my mother and she was Nina Gomez. I felt like crying at that instant.
My life took a great unexpected turn. There I was, trying to push out the only precious gift I got from my overnight stand, with a stranger beside me claiming to be my mother.
I really felt like her daughter the moment she held my left hand, caressing it and whispering encouraging words to my ears.
The anger I felt towards Daniel… or whatever his name is dissolved, when my baby, Ellah came out of me.
But she wasn’t crying.
I stood up to take a peek at my daughter and saw how red her skin was. I began to feel scared. Is something going to happen to my daughter? I asked but got no reply.
I knew the reason the moment the nurses took her from Nina. My heart skipped a beat when they went out of the room with my baby. I wanted to scream.
“Mom, what is happening? My baby…”
I stood up and we followed them out. She was taken into the Neonatal Immediate Care Unit and placed in an incubator. I was told my daughter would be kept there for weeks before she would be able to live.
Her eyes were closed and her breathing was slow. That created more fear in my heart. Nina was bothered too.
The doctor informed us that Ellah might come out of the care unit with a long-term health issue because of the fact that she was born prematurely. I cried.
The pain I felt after I was told about my baby’s condition wasn’t as much as the pain I felt during her labor. My cries were different from the cries of labor. It was a cry that was laced with pain and fear of losing my little princess.
Nina scolded me for stressing myself out for the birthday party and the doctor requested to check my blood pressure. It came out fine but I was not relieved. I was worried about my baby.
I used the period of Ellah’s stay in the NICU to recover fully and prepare myself emotionally for motherhood. Everything about motherhood seemed like a joke to me, not until I saw Ellah. I knew instantly that I needed to give it my all.
It was unexpected. I was inexperienced. But I was ready to cope, learn and be a good mother to my baby.
Larry usually comes to visit the baby and me almost every week and Nina tried to persuade me to go on a date with him. I told her he was just a friend to me and the baby but she didn’t believe me. She rolled her eyes at me and I laughed.
I told her I was being honest when I said I was not attracted to Larry and I guessed she eventually believed me because she stopped pestering me.
After Ellah was discharged from the hospital, Nina wanted to employ a nanny for her, so I can have time to write an exam to apply to a college, but Nadia wouldn’t let her.
Nadia said she was more than capable of looking after her goddaughter.
Five months after Ellah’s birth, I couldn’t help but think of the circumstances that surrounded my pregnancy and her subsequent birth, whenever I stare at her always smiling face. My graduation from high school, dad’s death, the disappearance of Ellah’s father, Maria’s relocation and Aunt Susana’s infidelity, the company’s sale, and even my writing career which I had given up on. The interest was no longer there.
I guess I found it hard to accept the rejection from Mr. Gonzalez’s company. It came as a shock because I was over-confident that my work would be accepted. I guess I was that confident and rest assured because Nina was involved and Larry’s editing skills were wonderful. But I was wrong. It was my work, not Nina’s.
I was supposed to be confident in myself and my capabilities but I couldn’t help it. I have had enough of all the bitterness life has thrown my way…. just within a year. Another rejection might break me, I can’t face it, I told myself.
My baby needed me to be alive. I needed to be there for her, so I gave up my passion, despite the encouragement from Nina and Larry.
When Stella came back from India, I followed Nina to the office to hand over the files I was handling for Nina to her. She was finally back with her ever-smiling husband. Her daughter was back on her feet as the surgery was successful.
She wouldn’t stop thanking Nina for the financial help.
Nina scolded her for not informing her on time and also asked her to take two weeks to break from work, so she could bond well with her daughter.
Nina paid me for the months Stella was away, even though she refused to let me do any of her office work during the first three months of Ellah’s birth. We both spent the first two months with Ellah in the Neonatal Immediate Care Unit where she was taken to immediately after her delivery.
My daughter was indeed a strong girl as she was discharged exactly two months after her birth.
She was indeed a beauty. At first, I was scared to hold her in my arms. I was scared I would be clumsy with her and she would fall from my hand and drop dead.
I couldn’t believe the little creature Nina was carrying came out of me. I was in a trance as I watched her smiling at my bundle of joy and my heart almost stopped the moment Ellah smiled back at Nina. I cried as we left the hospital for home.
Nina asked me to breastfeed Ellah exclusively for at least a year and the moment we got home from the hospital, she still wouldn’t let me do any work until Ellah clocked 4months.
The payment was huge and I was tempted to tell her to retain me. I laughed at my silliness. I had planned on saving for Ellah’s first birthday. I wanted it to be grand. My baby deserved it. She was my life changer. She made me believe in things I never believed in and that was destiny and fate.
I was destined to meet her father when I needed him and it was my destiny to birth his child…. our first fruit. I was destined to be a mother at the very young age of 17. I was destined to be Ellah’s mother and that was overwhelming enough.Content from NôvelDr(a)ma.Org.
It was my fate to lose both parents, even before I could give them grandchildren. I was fated to be a single mother, just like Nina.
And I doubted if I would be able to give any man a chance in my life again. I have a baby already. I have a lot to do with my life, having an affair or being committed to some asshole who wouldn’t be able to accept my baby and me, was definitely out of the question.
Well! Maybe I am also destined to be a single mother till eternity. That I was ready and willing to accept and embrace with all my soul.